Forgotten
by Nari Crow
Summary: This is a songfic about Axel, using a song by Holly Brooks. Rated for language, mostly.


A/N: This is just something to pass the time, because I have writer's block for "Better Know A Nobody." -sigh- Which really sucks, I'll tell ya that.

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts – Organization XIII does! Yay!

Xemnas: Yesh! Kingdom Hearts!

Sora: No! Die! -attacks with Keyblade-

Crow: . . . Yeeeaah. You do that. I'll get started on the story, before the reviewers/audience kills me.

Random reviewer: Get on with it!

Crow: I'm going, I'm going! Yeesh!

By the way, I don't own Holly Brooks, either, the person who sings this totally awesome song: "All Will Be Forgotten." If you read Maximum Ride, you should listen to her work. She's even on the Max Ride site! And if you don't read MaxRide, listen to her anyway, 'cuz she RAWKS!

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Forgotten

_Sittin' here I'm dwellin' on_

_The tings that I keep holding on_

_To yesterday._

Axel scratched his head, his eyes screwed shut in concentration.

"Think, Axel!" he said out loud. "Where were you before you came here?"

Axel had just joined the Organization XIII. Saix, the Nobody before him, had told him that he was number VIII. He had taken an instant disliking to the blue-haired man, although he wasn't sure why. Maybe it was Saix's cold demeanor. Maybe they simply rubbed the wrong way. Or maybe it was fate.

"Alex!" he exclaimed suddenly. "My name used to be Alex." He opened his eyes and grinned, jubilant. "And I'm from . . . from . . .," he stumbled on the next road block. His face fell. "All I remember is my name!"

He buried his head in his hands. "Tch, that sucks," he snorted, his voice muffled. So far, he couldn't remember anything beyond a few days ago, when he had turned up on the doorstep of the Castle That Never Was.

_Ties are broken,_

_Ties are made_

_I try so hard to find my way_

_Around this crazy place._

"Out! Out!" Vexen screeched, waving his hands angrily at Axel.

"Okay, I'm going; I'm going!" protested Axel, backing out of Vexen's precious lab. Vexen slammed the door in his bewildered face, rattling the walls.

Axel turned around and kicked the wall, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I thought we were friends," he muttered. Vexen had seemed polite when they first met. Then Axel had stumbled into his lab, and he had become a shrieking banshee, practically throwing Axel out.

"Vexen doesn't have friends," said a low, quiet voice that held an edge of amusement. Axel looked up with wide eyes and saw that Xigbar and Zexion had walked down the hall in time to hear Vexen slam his door. Zexion was staring at Axel with something that could have been pity – if he wasn't a Nobody.

"It's okay, kid," Xigbar told him in a gruff voice. "Vexen puts his lab first, no matter what."

"Stay out of his way," Zexion advised him, brushing past him.

"And feel free to come to me or Zexion here if anyone else gives you any trouble," Xigbar added as he hurried forward to catch up with his companion.

Axel blinked down the hall when they were bone. He had just lost a friend . . . and maybe, just maybe, he found two more?

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A week later, Axel was wandering around the castle halls, lost. The network of pathways had always been confusing, but now it was impossible to navigate.

Axel had been playing a game of hide-and-seek with the newcomer, Demyx. Demyx had the same goofy nature that Axel occasionally possessed. The only other person their age was Zexion, and he refused to play "that childish game."

But now Axel was lost, and Demyx was nowhere to be found.

"You lost, kid?" Axel gasped and whirled around, and almost bashed his head on Lexaeus's chest. How the quiet, wiry-haired man had managed to creep up on him, he didn't know.

"Um, yeah," Axel said slowly, backing away a few steps.

"What's your name?" Lexaeus asked.

"Axel. A-X-E-L. Got it memorized?" Axel replied, a challenging note in his trembling voice. Yes, Lexaeus scared him – who wouldn't be afraid of a giant man who could snap you like a twig? – but he wasn't going to let _Lexaeus_ know that.

Lexaeus grunted and rolled his eyes. "This way," he said reluctantly, leading him through a tangle of pillars. "May I ask why you didn't just teleport back to your room?" he asked as he stepped aside to show Axel the main hallway.

"Oh yeah," Axel said wonderingly, comprehension dawning on his face. Lexaeus shook his head and teleported away, leaving Axel to his game of hide-and-seek.

_Nobody seems to understand me._

_Till you came along and told me this:_

"Roxas, huh?" Axel remarked, looking him up and down. "You're what, fourteen?"

The blond-haired boy nodded. "And you are?" he inquired.

"What makes you think you're important enough to know my name?" Axel asked in mock haughtiness, his chest puffed out.

A delighted grin spread across Roxas's face. "What makes you think I'm not?" he challenged, standing up on his toes and poking Axel hard in the chest.

"Come back here, runt!" Axel growled as Roxas ran away. He ran after the boy, tackling him at full speed. They skidded down the hallway a few feet before coming to a stop. They were both laughing.

"You're the first one here that I've met who wasn't aloof," Roxas said, staggering to his feet.

Axel grinned. "You're the only one who shares my sense of humor." It was true; whenever he tried that on Demyx, he had taken it seriously and gotten offended. Zexion had gotten it, but didn't find it funny. Xigbar had been busy lately, so he hadn't been able to try it on him.

Roxas grinned back at him. "We're going to be best friends," he told Axel. "I can already tell."

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A few days later, Roxas and Axel were on the roof of the Castle That Never Was. Roxas was leaning back, his arms holding him up behind him and his legs splayed out. Axel was leaning forward, with his legs drawn slightly to his chest. His arms were wrapped around his knees, and his hands were clasped loosely in front of him.

Until that moment, they had been watching the moon in companionable silence. But now Axel spoke up. "You're different from the others," he said. "Even Demyx is . . . cold, emotionless, lost. He hides it with his antics, but I can still tell. But you . . .," he trailed off, shaking his head. "You're the only one who understands me."

". . . Maybe," Roxas offered slowly, "maybe it's because everyone else remembers their past. Old friends, old rivals. We've started over new."

Axel looked at his friend. "That's deep. Maybe you're right."

Roxas looked up at the sky. "After all, for us, all has been forgotten," he murmured, glancing at Axel, whose eyes _could_ have been brimming with tears- if it weren't for the fact that he was a Nobody.

_All will be forgotten._

_Every tear you've cried._

_As soon as you awaken,_

_To what's right in front of your eyes,_

_Standing by your side._

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_Sittin' here I'm thinkin' 'bout_

_The weather and the countryside around me._

_Simple little things like these_

_Are good to keep my silly mind_

_From wandering._

Gone. Roxas was gone.

Axel shook his head impatiently. He was in the Underworld, helping Demyx get ready, under Xemnas's orders. It was hard to focus on work, though. He kept seeing Roxas's eyes, blank and without recognition. He kept seeing Roxas's face, twisted in fury as he attacked the person who had once been his best friend. He had forgotten Axel, just as he had once forgotten his past.

It was a lot like what had happened to Roxas's other, Sora. 'To find is to lose, to lose is to find. To find what you need, you must give up something dear.'

"Hey," Demyx said softly, tugging on Axel's sleeve. Axel blinked, and realized he had almost run into a stone pillar.

"Sorry," he muttered.

Demyx blinked sympathetically at him. "It'll be okay," he promised wearily, although there was no conviction in his voice. Axel had noticed that, ever since Zexion had died, Demyx had been talking and smiling less and less. Without his reluctant friend, he seemed to have lost the will to live.

"If you say so," Axel replied quietly. The two disheartened Nobodies continued to walk across the area, clearing out any minor demons they happened upon. As he lit a creature on fire, Axel tried to remember the last time he had been happy, the last time he had laughed.

_I feel the summer breeze wash over me._

_I know the laughter,_

_Know the love,_

_Maybe I've just got enough to give._

It must have been a few days before Roxas had left. They had been playing cards, and Axel had been laughing about his own abysmal skills.

"You've got so much laughter in you," Roxas had told him. "More than any of the others."

"Even Demyx?" Axel joked, laughing as he lost another round of Uno.

"Even Demyx," Roxas confirmed as he reshuffled the cards.

Axel had sighed. "Maybe I just have so much, I have to give some of it away," he had told his friend.

Roxas grinned. "Maybe." Axel had felt a sudden rush of affection for the boy. He was like Axel's little brother.

He couldn't imagine laughing now, not with Roxas gone. He glanced at Demyx and felt a stab of guilt. It was his fault that Zexion was dead, even if Demyx didn't blame him. Zexion had been his friend, and he had killed him.

_It must have been that castle,_ Axel decided, remembering how odd Castle Oblivion had made him think and act. He hadn't been himself. Still, that didn't stop the rush of guilt that ran through him like a cold, heavy river of lead. He wished he could just forget it had ever happened.

_All will be forgotten._

_Every tear you've cried._

_As soon as you awaken,_

_To what's right in front of your eyes,_

_Standing by your side._

"I think I liked it better when they were on my side," Axel remarked as he stood back to back with the Keyblade master.

"There are too many!" Sora cried out, his voice painfully similar and painfully different from Roxas's.

"Ha! I can handle these punks," Axel assured him. "Watch this!" Even as he put his entire being into the attack, a small part of him hesitated_. Do you really want to give this guy a chance to get rid of the Organization?_ that bit of him asked.

_Roxas is a part of this kid; I'll help him!_ he snarled back as fire burst in all directions, infused with his life force. He fell to the ground, spots dancing in his eyes.

_I'll help him,_ he thought to himself. _No matter the cost._

_The road is long before me now,_

_The memories beg me to stay._

_But lonely is born from pride, I find,_

_And so I reach out . . ._

He was dying. He knew it even as Sora fell to his knees beside him.

_What the hell were you thinking?_ the part of him that had hesitated before snarled. It had seemed to take on a life of its own. _What about Xigbar? He's still alive!_

At the same time, Sora spoke to him. Axel answered, and found memories bombarding him. Memories of Zexion, Xigbar, Demyx. Memories of laughter and fun times with the Organization. Memories of Roxas. Had he doomed the Organization?

But as he looked into Sora's eyes, he knew he had done the right thing. There was barely a trace of Roxas in his eyes. Almost everyone was gone; only Xemnas, Xigbar, Luxord, and Saix remained.

Axel sighed and closed his eyes as his body faded away, the shadows of his life dissipating. Death lay before him, a long, lonely journey. He reached out gladly to death. Roxas had been forgotten, and it was time that he was forgotten, too.

_All will be forgotten._

_Every tear you've cried._

_As soon as you awaken,_

_To what's right in front of your eyes,_

_Standing by your side._

Death was boring.

Axel trudged along a dark gray, winding path. As far as the eye could see, there was nothing but grayness. Every once in a while he thought he could see the faint form of an Organization member in the distance. Sometimes it was Zexion, or Demyx, or Xigbar, but never Roxas. But they faded like mist as soon as he stepped off the path.

A few weary hours later, Axel was walking with his eyes closed. He never got hungry, thirsty, or tired, but the inside of his eyelids was far more interesting than the uniform grayness.

Suddenly feeling watched, Axel opened his eyes and turned around. He gasped.

Standing in front of him was Roxas. His body was translucent, and sparkles lit up his wavering form.

"Roxas?" he whispered. The apparition gave him a watery smile. He faded away, the sparkles rising into the air and winking out.

Axel shut his eyes, his throat burning. For a moment he was sure he would lost control and begin sobbing on the pebbly ground.

"Roxas is gone," he told himself firmly in a hoarse, tear-choked whisper. "Move on."

A snatch of song ran through his head. He had never heard it before, but he knew it in the hollow space where his heart once was. It sang to his soul, as if _he_ was that song. Peace stole over him as the song soothed his grieving mind.

Turning from the place where the apparition had stood, Axel began walking along the path. Now able to see a faint glimmer of light in the distance, he half-muttered, half-sang,

"_Sittin' here I'm dwellin' on_

_The things that I keep_

_Holdin' on_

_To yesterday."_

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Hello again! I'm just here to harp on my own story.

I'm sorry if I wasn't too clear on the Axel dying scene, I've forgotten the exact words, so I kinda glossed over it. I didn't want those of you specific gamers out there flaming me!

Also, this was put together in a hurry, so if there are mistakes, feel free to point them out!

I've got a few more ideas for other songfics, using more of Holly Brook's songs. She's AWESOME, dude!

All flames will be sent directly to Axel, who will return them tenfold. :D


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